If you are a single, never married parent, or if you know someone who is please tell them about this.
The picture you see posted is my great nephew, Elijah. My niece and Elijah's father, Lee, never married, but have been living together. She just gave birth to their second child a month ago. Lyberty is a beautiful little girl.
Lee planned a one weeks vacation to Texas to visit his parents. He wanted to take Elijah along so he could meet his grandparents. They would be traveling with the Lee's aunt, leaving Friday Nov. 21st and returning Sunday, Nov. 30th.
Lee had to be back at work Monday morning. My niece agreed and hugged and kissed them both before they left. Lee called several times on the way to let my niece know how they were progressing and again when they arrived at his parent's home.
Sunday came and the aunt pulled in right on time. She lives just a few doors down. My niece rushes to greet them, excited and anxious to see them. But Lee and Elijah weren't with the aunt. The aunt refuses to speak to my niece. My niece is freaking out. She calls Texas and is told Lee isn't there. She calls a few times and there is always a reason why Lee isn't available. My niece calls the police and they tell her they can't do anything because Elijah is with his father. She is in shock! She has no idea what to do now.
As soon as I knew and she told me what the police had said, I went to work. I contacted the Vanished Child Alliance. They told me that even though Elijah was with his father, he wasn't where he was supposed to be so he was considered missing. Before they could help us there had to be a police report filed that Elijah was missing. I tell my niece to get the police back out and tell them she needs to file this report. Again the police say they can't do anything. Now I'm really angry so I called the FL Dept of Law Enforcement. They govern all law enforcement in the state. They told me that before law enforcement can act, there has to be a custody agreement. We have to hire an attorney and file an Ex Parte Order for Temporary Custody of Elijah. Once the order is filed they can go get Elijah because the father is in violation of the order.
My niece contacted legal aid and is wating for an attorney with them to contact her now. In the meantime I'm trying to find an attorney who will work pro bono because we do not have the funds to hire a private attorney. Legal Aid moves very slow because they have so many cases to handle and we have been told we have to move fast.
We always believed if you weren't married the mother has legal custody of the child unless the father challenges. Not true. If you know a single parent who has never been married to the childs other parent you need to make them aware of this. Get a legal custody agreement even if the parents are living together. My niece never expected this to happen. There were no problems between her and Lee. She didn't think he would leave his daughter. Don't let this happen to you or anyone you know!!
I am hoping one day in the near future medical providers, child support agents, etc will be letting single unmarried persons aware of this. Maybe we can get something put into effect so that a custody agreement is taken care of at the same time the birth certificate is done. Also, I believe if there is a custody agreement and a parent knows they will be a part of their childs life regardless of relationship status, we will see fewer abductions of this type. If and abduction occurs, law enforcement can act immediately. I'm sure law makers can come up with a plan to implement this.
Please help me get the word out. I am posting on numerous blog sites and writing to newspapers, magazines... anyone who will listen to me. Thank you for reading and please, please let people know!
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4 comments:
Hang in there Loretta, You are a warrior, and doing a great job! I will do what I can! I can definitly pray for your family and that sweet baby Elijah, I know he misses his mommy....love ya sis
Hi Loretta,
I remember telling you a few days ago that you have to get an order (exparte) entered with the Court in order to have Elijah returned. I worked in family law before and this happen with a married couple whose wife ran off with the husband our client's toddler children (boy and girl) to California. He hired my boss and filed for divorce and with an order to return the children. My boss/attorney, filed a motion and order for the return of these children and to appear before the Friend of the Court to work out visitations equally. She ended up coming home on the Court date because when she received those divorce papers and the order she got scared and knew she was in for a legal fight. This case turned out good but I know this can also happen with married couples as well. You still have to hire an attorney and go through the legal channels.
Legal Aid is slow, yes and I also told you that. Is there anyway your family can pull their resources together because as you said, time is of the essence. Some attorneys will let you retain with some money down and you can make payments if you situation is dire. Usually a sole practioner has more of a heart and will allow you to make payments in good faith to him each month. You might have to initially come up with $300.00 to $500.00 to get it started. As long as the father doesn't fight the Court Order with his attorney, (assuming he hires one) you may scare him into coming home once he sees the order entered and served upon him. I really think the best avenue you could go with is to pool your families money together and anyone else that might want to contribute/donate, i.e., church members, friends, neighbors, etc. Time is of the essence. Do you belong to a church? I am still praying for Elijah's safe return. The Lord does provide, but "we" your family, have to act. I know you are a warrior but you can't do this alone.
God bless you and your family
Keep us posted
Love,
Carrie Ann
Where I live, in South Carolina, even married, and split parents face very interesting "legal" rights. I was in the middle of helping a friend, with his wife and baby. He ended up leaving his wife, with me, and taking the baby!
Because there was no custody order, and while this was going through the awful court system, that I was so unfortunate to witness, the sheriff specifically told us that "Physical Custody" would reign, per the legal parent.
He told us to not return the baby, after our "pre-arranged visitation" because she only had legal rights, without an order, to him, while he was physically with her.
This meant, though, that if anyone was babysitting, because she had a job, the father could legally pick the baby up.
In my experience, never married had little to do with the custody.
Best of luck to you and your family.
Heidi - Outside of Charleston
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